A horse is a horse is a horse.
Horses are amazing. I love them. They are fun and exhilarating and stimulating and sweet.
They are also giant, 900 pound plus prey animals with complete minds of their own. We work with them and train them over years and years so that we can try to get consistent responses to predictable aids, and the vast majority of the time it works. Most horses, when taught in a systematic, fair, and compassionate way, learn many responses very well and can interact with us swimmingly, much of the time.
Except when they can’t. When it’s cold/hot/windy/sunny, or when they’re hormonal/cranky/stressed/excited, or, more often than not, when we have some kind of particular plan for them. Every horse is different. Every situation is different. But most of the horses I meet will have days when they have excess energy that just needs to come out somehow, or it’s going to come out in some kind of unpleasant way when we try to work with them.
Often for me, this means I will free lunge the horse in a safe space until they’re ready to start thinking. Some horses will only get more riled up by this, so they may have to be lunged, free or in side reins, before they can be safely ridden. Other horses may just need to trot or canter under saddle until they’ve blown off enough steam to start listening. Some can’t do any of that safely, and will just need to have simple, straightforward tasks to do on the ground or under saddle. Others might just need to go back in the field that day.
Most of the time, when this happens, it is not a reflection on you, your riding, your horse, your training, or any of that. It is just a reflection of your horse being a prey animal who loves to move and has extra energy. This is fine. This is not an emergency. It is up to us to determine the best way to approach the situation, and to do so without judgment. It is all well and fine to have a plan with a horse, but it is finer yet to be flexible about how they are feeling that day.
And more than anything, how YOU are feeling. Your safety is the first priority. There is never any shame in skipping a day, or doing groundwork instead of riding, or committing to a walk on a trail ride instead of cantering. I have done all of the above many times, and will do so again. I need to keep the work we are doing within my comfort level, and within what the horse is capable of doing that day. The better we know each other, the better able I am to gauge what those might be.
The trouble comes when we start adding judgment to ourselves or our horses for those moments. The horse does not do these things because he’s bad or naughty or doesn’t like you. You do not struggle because you’re incompetent or worthless or weak. These are circumstances that will likely occur with most horses at some point because they are prey animals with a strong flight instinct.
(If you find yourself consistently over-faced, or scared, or worried, or if this happens more frequently than not, that is a sign you need help, either with your training or a veterinary issue.)
Keep yourself safe, cut you and your horse some slack, and live to see another day, in whatever method that works for you!